Recession Watch: At least it's 2010 Edition

"The Shrimp Girl" or "The Saleswoman of Crabs" was on a Yemeni postage stamp in 1969. 

The Lady is a lover of all things beautiful - chief of these is the study of art! I present to you the silliest name in all of art history - "The Shrimp Girl".

I like this Lady - she's buxom, happy to be storing clams and musssls in her giant hat while wearing a joyfully blank expression!  Maybe being a "Shrimp" girl makes me chuckle due to the Lady's own small stature. Maybe I relate to her cheerily vacant look (despite her fishy life) since it takes little more than a cupcake and new lipstick to make the Lady equally as happy?  Or perhaps she's just got a streak of 13 year old boy in her psyche to not giggle like a fool at being a purveyor of crabs (heh).   

For those who feel life is burdensome....Hippie Edition

 A Pink Lady to celebrate your Friday Afternoon - so much tastier after a good week of work!

The Lady has just discovered  igoogle's "Literary Quote of the Day":

"I really would like to stop working forever - never work again, never do anything like the kind of work I'm doing now - and do nothing but write poetry and have leisure....Just a literary and quiet city-hermit existence." - Allen Ginsberg

Join the club, Ginsberg! Your discomfort might be linked to why it's called "work" - and why the Lady will never be a beat poet. Unfortunately this city girl isn't ready to liberate herself from the fiscal enslavement that is integral to the joys of Cost Plus Wine, new shoes and Netflix.

Thank heavens that I also have access to the Spongebob Squarpants Quote Generator! Today's offering:

Squidward: What can i get ya, stranger?

SpongeBuck: Gimme a shot.....of milk. 

Squidward: Milk?

SpongeBuck: Two percent

Squidward: You think you can handle it?

Ah, much better. Who's Spongebuck?

SSC: Gentlemen Prefer Blondes

 

 H-O-T-T

This fantastic contribution to cinema certainly represents a different approach when it comes to job searching that the Lady had not yet considered. Lo, had the Lady not been stamped by her Domestic Patriarch, perhaps she too might have an opportunity to sail across the ocean, performing an elaborate series of 3 minute songs with more production value than Fantasmic! What a fabulous life - seducing old men named "Piggy", carousing with the Olympic swim team, not to mention shimmying with Algerian gypsy children in Fez Hats while I bemoan my own destitution.

WHERE TO BEGIN!? At the beginning, of course!

Stamped! Fox 11 NewsBreak Edition!

Though the Lady has returned to the Big City Life, she has not forgotten her philanthropic endeavors. She still supports the notion of better living through fancy hats, Earl Gray, learning, self-respect, appreciation of others, and tea sandwiches.

Click HERE for a fantastic primer on all that's good and wonderful about the Crown Jewel Club.

The Song Remains the Same

Hi There! I'm actor John Cusack, here to warn you to NOT doubt the power of the mixtape. Otherwise, you too might up in a project called "Hot Tub Time Machine'.  Just Sayin.

The Lady is delighted to announce that she is on the precipice of her first month of employment since April 2009! She couldn't be happier - Domestic Patriarch is happily sipping his Tom Collins in gratitude, and the Lady is back to purchasing as many scarves and pancake makeup as her new salary might allow!

It's a remarkable adventure, returning to the workforce - crimson lipstick and all. Best of all the Lady has a brand new commute - I've retired the carefree ocean waves for the hustle and bustle of downtown Anytown, USA! It's a gorgeous ride, and as such I've moved from the oppressive jabbering of morning time radio in favor of books on tape, podcasts, and the beloved, hallowed mixtape of yesteryear.

I decided, in the spirit of renewal, to clean the beloved Accord named Harold. In the depths of his compartments I found a curious CD, enscribed in the Lady's own writing (and I quote), "MISC - AWESOME!". I had absolutely no recollection of the formulation of this mix. I popped the disc in the player, and was quite proud. Though, I am curious, dear readers - if this mix merits "AWESOME".

I humbly request that my lovely readers....make the call!

Footprints

 

One night I sat on my kitchen floor cleaning my roomba.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the pink rug of my floor as I cleaned my roomba, removing the paneling and latches to dust every nook and cranny; insisting that reading the instructions were not necesary. 

Spam: Def Jam Edition

Why Hello Lady! I'm music mogul and fashion magnate Russell Simmons! May I show you my Amex?!

The Lady applied for an ideal job at the corporate HeadQuarters of one of our Nation's leading purveyors of overpriced and sugar laden coffees. This particular employer posted their listings exclusively with Yahoo! Hotjobs. Since applying,  I have been bombarded with a slew of email ostensibly intended to aid me in my quest - why else would they require my email address on file? Surely for hungry employers that might feast mightily on the meaty goodness that is my resume (maybe not).

 I thought I'd share some in case you need any of these services: