Friday, November 27, 2009

Coif it Up - Recession Concession



A Lady always secures her beloved 'do in place - protect those beloved tresses from the elements!


The hair is the richest ornament of women. ~Martin Luther 


Oh Luther, maybe the Lady is stamped after all!


When a Lady IS stamped by patriarchy/recession, certain financial concessions must be made: fewer martinis, stockings, blotting paper and rose water to name a few. However, there is one department in which the Lady simply cannot acquiesce - that would be her 4 trips per year to her beloved therapist's hairdresser's. 





The Lady is indeed lucky to have had the same artist work on her tresses since she was 17 years old. Her prices are fantastic, spirit is amazing and talent is worth 10x what she charges.  For some Ladies, new hair represents the penultimate in emotional and spiritual renewal. It puts a bounce in our step and launches our confidence - benefits that are hard to quantify and yet so very necessary when stamped by Recession Patriarchy!


The cost however, is not so small that it cannot be entirely unnoticed. The Lady first noticed the information gap between her and Domestic Patriarch when, in the midst of a passionate monologue praising Beloved Hairdresser that DP began to give me the same look I give him when he talks about measuring tire pressure : slightly slackjawed, bored, confused, and pretty sure that it'll never be understood. 


"But she's so cheap!" "But she's my friend!" "But look at how creative she is!"  "But she's the Best!" DP remains unconvinced. Even the Lady on her most loquacious of days can't seem to articulate her passion for the ritual. And even worse, The Lady has been hard pressed to come up with a comparable patriarchal cost center. Beer? Cable TV?  Jamba Juice? None of this feels right.


Of course there's always the flipside:  The one haircut I didn't pay for was in 1999 when Paternal Patriarch brought his 28 year old Thai hooker girlfriend to live with myself and 13 year old brother for 3 weeks (about the length of time it took for my mother's lawyer to draft a letter entitled "Get the Prostitute out of The Summit"). They jointly decided I needed Meg Ryan's style from "You've got Mail". The woman then proceeded to cut all my hair off, shave my neck and bark incessantly in broken English on the patio of my father's overpriced townhouse. 


DP was kind enough to wait until my hair had fully grown back to politely ask that I never allow that again because I didn't look like Meg Ryan I looked like Baby Huey. 


This is exactly why we pay very specific people who know what they are doing. A common language also helps.  


And yet, Luther himself has spoken.  Though well intentioned, the Patriarchy hath spelled out Good Hair's importance which we Ladies know all too well.  Not every lady is as particular as this one, but I still sense the Holy Trinity, the evolution of our current banking crisis and the idea that Kate Hudson is still making money doing Romantic Comedies might be easier to dissect. We may never really understand. 


But at the very least we Ladies will look good trying. 

Hair style is the final tip-off whether or not a woman really knows herself.  
~Hubert de Givenchy, Vogue, July 1985



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